Dating single parent meeting kids
Is it easier to date someone else who also has kids—someone who will “get it” when you can’t be spontaneous or flexible with your schedule?
Or is it easier to date someone who doesn’t have kids whose schedule is wide open and can more easily work around yours? “It's on my profile because it's a huge part of my life.
While we’ve discussed meeting each other’s kids, it’s something we’re holding off on until we’re sure this is a stable, serious relationship. I have friends who waited almost a year, and one who only waited 2 weeks. It depends on the kids’ ages, personalities, and [specific] situations.” —Hannah, 43, Dayton, OH“I have a rule that I have to have been dating the person for a year. For example, if I was dating someone who had kids in the same age group, it would make sense for us and our kids to hang out and it wouldn’t necessarily need to be a ‘’ moment. My kids know me better than anyone, and I actually trust their judgment of people’s character.” —Hannah, 43, Dayton, OH“If they didn't like someone initially, not necessarily. But a person’s parenting style is very revealing, and a couple times I was turned off by what felt like tolerance for abusive behavior from their young (6-10 year-old) sons.
But I haven’t felt the need to break that rule yet.” —Annie, 30, Moscow, IDWould you stop dating someone if you kids didn’t like them? Kids have complicated emotions just like I do, and I think they deserve a chance to work through whatever emotional hang-ups they may have about a situation. That was really hard to watch and it made me want to get out of the relationship.” —Jeff, 52, Boston, MA“I have never dated someone with kids.
I can’t dive in head over heels with someone, staring directly into their eyes unblinkingly for three months straight while reveling in the feeling of a new love anymore.
I am on full-time mom duty every other week and the time away from any potential prospects has given me time to look at things a little more honestly and realistically.” —Annie, 30, Moscow, IDWhat are some logistical concerns about dating with kids? It’s difficult being a single mother and getting everything done in my life and doing it well—let alone finding time to regularly make commitments with another person. I don’t have a ton of financial resources, so I struggle to pay for sitters and the clothes and getting my hair done regularly.” —Ivy, 38, Charleston, SC“If a woman I'm dating comes over, it has to be post-bedtime.
Second, a lot of people aren’t that interested in a relationship with someone who has kids.
It went fine.” —Matthew, 45, Huntington Beach, CADoes having children make you look for different things in a partner? “This is important: Even when your kid is an asshole, a mom can’t—and shouldn’t—choose the other person.
It’s your child and your priority, no matter how much you love that man.
And since I won’t introduce the kids to my boyfriend yet, he's never been to my home. ” —Hannah, 43, Dayton, OH“Sometimes it was finding/affording a babysitter.
Deciding boundaries and sticking to them, especially when your heart is so happy.
What if we are having a great first date but my kids are a dealbreaker for them?