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Germans won't say ‘it's nice to meet you’ unless they truly believe it's been nice.” The same culture applies to break-ups, said British expat Laura, whose German boyfriend of three years one day told her that he thought their relationship should end.
In vivid detail, he explained he was interested in an acquaintance and wanted to see where it would go.
“All cities have a different vibe, and Hamburg is much more family-focused,” says Shoup, who was struck by all the mini-vans she initially saw on the street.
“I have advised people to go there if looking for something serious, but with patience I think you can meet someone anywhere.” Even in cities such as Berlin, she advised Germans and expats alike to get involved with meet-ups, whether cooking or dancing, to meet people with similar interests.
“Dating here is definitely difficult,” he said with a tone of resignation.
“Everyone thinks they can find someone who’s a better fit, and people often don’t really try to get deeply involved with each other anymore.” Shy about approaching a woman in German or English, Max, 30, turned to the app Tinder to find a partner, contrary to its application as an app for easy hook-ups.
Stephan, 38, a German living in Berlin, turned to with the hopes of eventually finding another relationship after one that lasted 12 years had ended.
For a breath of fresh air, she turned to one of her favourite hobbies: hiking.
There she found it easier to strike up a conversation with other expats and Germans, both platonically and as potential flames.
He found himself in a more difficult landscape than in his 20s, when he met his long-term partner through work and after a few dates decided they were in an exclusive relationship.
With online dating, he has had no problems meeting women, but instead of the third or fourth date evolving into something more serious, it usually ends.
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